


a complete stranger

by MaddieandChimney



Series: Maddie Buckley Week 2020 [3]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M, tw: mentions of gun/gun shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:34:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25820704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddieandChimney/pseuds/MaddieandChimney
Summary: Maddie Buckley Week Day 3 - “You want to tell me about it?” + angst.The aftermath of the hostage situation as dispatch brings up memories Maddie wishes she could forget.
Relationships: Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han
Series: Maddie Buckley Week 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1861234
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	a complete stranger

Maddie feels her body lunging forward, her heart slamming against her chest and sweat pouring from her forehead. Her fingers move to grip tightly at the skin on her arm, trying to remind herself that she’s awake. She’s in Chimney’s apartment, she’s with the man she loves and who loves her. She’s safe.

She can feel his presence, thankful that he doesn’t try to touch her, not right then. He knows better than to try and comfort her when her body is still trembling and her breathing is heavy. But she can feel the way he shifts just that little closer to her when he’s sitting up, just enough so she can remind herself that she’s okay. The nightmare was just… a nightmare. Even if it wasn’t, it was a memory she held of something that seemed to be a whole lifetime ago, triggered by the events of the day.

It’s not until her breathing has calmed some and she tilts her head to finally look at her boyfriend, than he wraps an arm around her and pulls her gently into his lap. She can distinctly remember a time when post-nightmare haze would have left her pulling away from even the slightest of touches, but she craves the comfort of his arms around her. His lips press against her head and it feels as though she’s home, that she’s safe and for a millisecond, she forgets what she had even been crying about in the first place.

“You want to tell me about it?” Chimney finally whispers, fingers raking through long hair before she tilts her head up to look at him. Maddie thinks about it for a moment, knowing she can open up to the man holding her but also wary of upsetting him. Of course, he knew of the events that had accumulated over the day, he knew all about every single second she had experienced with Doug over a year before. He knew everything there was to know about her because she had opened her world up to him in a way she had never felt comfortable doing with anyone else, but she still struggled to get the words out.

Maddie takes a deep breath, giving herself a little time to come to a decision, to gather her scattered thoughts before she nods her head a little. “I-I just…” Her hand moves to her chest, where she had felt the gun pressing up against her skin in the hours before. She doesn’t fully understand what was going through her head at the time, whether she had even thought about the implications of what would happen if he had pressed that trigger. She didn’t want to die, she had absolutely no desire to leave Chimney or Buck, her friends and her life behind.

The fact that her dreams immediately flashed to the moment Doug had shot that cashier in front of her, gives her a snippet of insight into the inner workings of her own brain. Maybe on some level, a usually hidden, deeper level, she wanted to feel how that man had felt when her husband had shot him in cold blood. Just for a second, she felt as though she deserved that level of pain he must have felt because he had tried to save her. He wouldn’t have died if she hadn’t tried to run – two people had been hurt that night because she had decided to run from Doug and only one of them had survived. The very man who was holding her tightly in his arms when her body starts to tremble once more.

“I remember how scared he looked, how desperate he was when I went to him and I tried to tell him that help would come. That he could be saved. He was terrified of dying and he had so much to live for—he had a family and a life. He was a good man, so good that he tried to protect me and he didn’t even know me.” It barely takes a moment for Chimney to realise exactly who she’s talking about, as his arms suddenly wrap that little tighter around her and she can feel tears from his own eyes falling onto her forehead when her eyes close.

“And then there was another shot, his blood—I could taste it in my mouth, I could… feel it on my face and he was gone. Just like that. He was gone and—his eyes were still open, he hadn’t even seen it coming. One minute he was just living his life, doing his job and the next…” She drops her hand from her chest as she shakes her head, “I let one of those men… today… I let him hold a gun to my chest and I thought of that wonderful cashier who could have so easily turned a blind eye and he’d still be alive today.”

Maddie doesn’t miss the way her boyfriend flinches at her words, or how his movements through her hair pause for just a second until they resume. His breath is trembling but he still holds her, still remains silent in the hopes she’ll get it all out. “I haven’t thought about him in so long, I feel awful because… he died for me, essentially. He died because of a decision he made to try and protect me… a complete stranger, some woman he could have just—forgotten about. I forgot about him until that gun was being pointed at me and I—I couldn’t stop thinking about how he must have felt, if he felt as scared as I did in that moment.”

The tears pour down her cheeks, tilting her head into his shoulder, wiping her soaked cheeks on the material of his top before she takes a breath. There’s nothing Chimney can say or do that will change the past or stop the nightmares from coming but when his lips press to the top of her head and his hand drops to rub circles on her back, she at least feels herself beginning to relax. Even just a little. “I love you, Maddie.”

It’s enough to know that he loves her, that he’ll love her no matter what words fall from her lips, or what truths she tells him. He still loves her, and that’s enough to at least slow down the tears as she snuggles a little more into the warmth of his body. “Promise?”

“Promise.”


End file.
